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My water was luke warm at best, and disgusting Mooshi slobbered all in it, and he puts his furr into the water!! Oh Bleck! To think that I ~ Queen Elsa have to suffer from hairball attacks and it's not even my hair! Umph! Yucky Mooshi!
I suffered, I suffered greatly I tell you, and the litter boxes. Oh my, the condition of the litter boxes just made me weep. In fact, I was forced to be so bold as to add to the poopies at the end of the hallway in order to illustrate my utter disgust at humoms total irresponsibility of being off galevanting all night long!
Oh ~ and to top it off, McKenna has her babies now, and she was squalling all night complaining about no noms for the mama who just gave birth, and no humom, and then the kittens crying all night long, and on an on about how she needed special treatment and her warm KMR drink before bed! Are you kidding me?! I am the Queen here, not Miss McKenna...KMR drink indeed. Pfft.
Mooshi went around yowling about missing humom and wanting his tomato treats (I told he is a vegetarian the weirdo!) When Mooshi yowls he sounds like a baby pterodactyl and I was subjected to listening to this all night long. UGH!
All the bedroom doors were closed, so I had to sleep on the lumpy, no cover having, no down pillow having, dog slobbered on couch! Why, it's as if I were just a common house cat or something! Not to mention the fact that Mooshi insisted on cuddling right up next to me, it will keep us warmer he says, I have thick fur to keep you snugly with he says...I ended up sneezing all night while he snored away. He twitches in his sleep you know...he says he chasing tomatos in the great tomato field, evidently the ripest, juiciest tomato of all gives all good vegetarian cats the best tomato juice ever in a crystal gobblet if you can catch him. Mooshi hasn't caught the Great tomato yet. It's a quest of his. I just wanted humom and some fresh food! All good humoms know that half a bowl of cat food is like no cat food at all, it's not fresh, I can't eat that. I am not going to be raising scavenger kittens here!
So finally, finally, humom gets home. At long, long last. She brought the idiots with her and she smelled like all manner of dog and of all things..potato chips and bread. Whatever, while she was out enjoying her chip fest, I was suffering at length. I told her all about it too. Very loudly.
Do yo know what she said? She said "I know Elsa, I love you too kitty, I missed you too, I will get you some extra food in just a moment. Let me wash up."
Wash up! Is she joking? It's cat food, you pour it from a bag, how risky is that really? Moreover, I was NOT saying I love you, I was telling her how awful it was of her to leave me in this horrendous state! I rubbed against her legs hoping she would feel the rib bones that surely are protruding right this moment due to the torturous starvation she chose to put me through.
She ruffled my fur and set some noms down in front of me and then went on about her merry way! What an utter shock! I did not sit on her lap and purr for her for at least 2 hours just so she knew the full extent of my disdain.
Please oh loyal Queen Elsa followers, please do not be duped by her tales of woe when she is leaving me here left to my own devices in Weedy Flats whilst she gives not a care for my welfare, as was obvious by the state of my un-fresh food when she finally deemed it unnecessary to make an appearance here to tend to me...her ever loving and purrful fur baby...Elsa..the Queen.
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