Little Known Facts about the Uncommon House Dobby

Little Known Facts About the uncommon House Dobby

First off all it is important to note that not all house Dobbys are created equal.  Case in point, my house Dobby suffers from a rain phobia.  He absolutely can not/will not go outside for any reason if it happens to be raining, or drizzling, or wet.   The poor thing is then forced to stay inside on the couch in front of video games under several layers of “fuzzy blanket” that only he is allowed to touch.  It’s a sad state I tell you, given the fact that my house is in some state of rain/wet/drizzle most of the time.  When my house Dobby does take it upon himself to suffer the dreaded, the awful, the rain to do something outside. ~ like fix the round pen…he makes quick work of it and enters the house shaking off his damp clothing much like a dog. 

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Another little known fact about the uncommon house Dobby is that they like to EAT.  You would never guess this, as they remain extremely skinny at all times no matter what manner of fried foods, junk food, sweets or anything containing calories they stuff in their mouths.  My Dobby contends that it is genetic and that he has a high metabolism.  I wonder if that “high metabolism” is the same “genetic” marker that keeps him on the couch for days on end, or sleeping until 1:00 p.m. in the afternoon even when he goes to bed at 10:00 p.m. the night before.  Is it THAT high metabolism? When I find out the secret of the Dobby skinny-ness I will let all women know everywhere.  We will bottle it and sell it and be skinny rich girls togetherJ 

Meanwhile, this eating habit means that anything I do not want touched as snack food, must clearly marked…and pointed out physically or he will play the “I didn’t see the writing on the package” game.  I have lost several bags of chocolate chips this way.  We won’t even mention entire dinner plans that have been dashed due to the high eating drive of the Dobby.  An entire cooked ham can disappear in one afternoon when I run to the post office or local store.  Bags of walnuts clearly intended for baking needs ~ poof ~ no more walnuts.  Woe is it to me when I get a large package of chicken nuggets and expect them to be available for a quick lunch on a lazy Saturday afternoon when my 12-year old son is anxious to get back outside.  HA!  Even after several warnings the house Dobby cannot prevent himself from sneaking into said nuggets.  No amount of threatening will cease his great cravings for the soggy microwaved taste of the nugget.  We don’t buy those anymore.   Left overs from the rare restaurant meal are not safe either!  One afternoon after a particularly grueling day, I had been dreaming about the scrumptious taste of the Mexican food I had left in the fridge from the day before.  Oh, the yummy melted cheese, the spicey meat, the peppers, the sauce ~ I even had chips and guacamole!  Oh for JOY!  NOT ~ I found the Styrofoam container neatly in the trash and a quite satisfied Dobby on the couch.  I had peanut butter and jelly ~ sans the jelly as Dobby had polished that off during a morning toast fest.  When I pointed out the “NO touchy” labels on the container I was met with a smug  “It was there, I was hungry, I didn’t’ see it.” 

It is also important to note that Dobbys do NOT take well to any kind of criticism, either real or imagined.  They tend to have a bit of a short fuse on most things….maybe all things.  They can be quite grumpy and belligerent.  Much like a child having a tantrum if they feel threatened in any way.  Such as when gently reminded how to spell the word “Any”  a.n.y.  (not aney)   In order to suppress such child like pouting, we have employed the “inner Mike” technique.  This is where we call upon the gentle, ever patient, ever kind, ever forgiving spirit of our wonderful friend Michael to take over in the situation.  This usually works to restore what Dobby considers a smile to his face. 

I have put a ban upon on all temper tantrum having, pouting and grumpyness in my  household!  We will only be subjected to love and light!!  It is a rule that will be obeyed or the Dobby will get his sock and go.  Now, Dobby realizes this and generally keeps his pouting to a minimum. 

So, if you decide to get a house Dobby, like we have, please do a field test before bringing him home to ensure your  Dobby will fit in with your lifestyle and personality.  Dobby’s can be exceptionally handy to have around.  So long as you employ the proper techniques to manage your Dobby. 

Stay tuned for a post on what to look for in a good Dobby!